Over The Weekend #37

This weekend there isn't many pictures as I spent most of it

asleep in bed! Chronic pain mixed with flu symptoms had me exhausted and sleeping for most of the weekend!

Saturday we did manage to get to the library and park with Oisìn

we spent sometime reading, then went for coffee and then to the park.

Oisìn again this weekend is pushing boundaries and testing our patience to see what
he can and can't get away with!
He spent a good bit of time on the naughty chair again this weekend!

It has been hard as I have been laid up in bed, in alot of pain, trying to be semi-normal
to be honest Paul has took alot of the parenting duties this week and weekend
He has been fantastic looking after my chronic pain needs, been great around the house doing chores and cooking meals, while also doing all the Daddy duties.
He also brought Oisìn swimming Saturday when he knew I really need peace and pain relief!
I spent Saturday night reading and Paul also fancied an early night
he isn't much of a big reader so I was shocked when he picked this mammoth book in the library!

His and hers reading material!
So today I have mostly spent in bed, I am feeling sore but not as bad as the pass
couple of days thankfully!

Oisìn came into our bed for a little earlier and it was
so sweet to have a little nap with him.
I have spent most of today reading sleeping and watching
booktube which is my new favourite thing!

We have just finished a lovely Sunday roast that Paul cooked
I am going to have a long soak in a bubble bath and an early night
Hoping that next weekend will be better and I will finally get some relief from chronic illness.

Living With Chronic Pain

This week has been tough....hell this month has been tough..wait a minute actually this whole year so far has been tough!

I have a few different illnesses PCOS, Endometriois, IBS and Epiploic Appendagitis which individually I can deal with but together knock me for six!

The past two weeks have been especially bad as I have a flare up with my IBS,  twisted bowel and Endometriois which has left me in alot of pain and bed ridden.

I also found out last month that the cysts on my left ovary has got bigger which has me in alot of pain.

I am currently waiting on the results of more tests, while also waiting to go back to the hospital next week for more tests and CT Scans

Living with chronic pain is a constant up hill battle, so far this year I have lost count of the amount of tests, scans and appoinments I have had! I feel like am living in my bed as I'm either exhasusted from fatguie or in so much pain. I have cancelled so many plans, girl nights out, dinners, lunches and family days out as I can't move due to pain. I have bought Oisìn toys to back up for the fact that most of the time I am in too much pain or so exhausted to do much with him. Which leads to a whole load of guilt on my part which is another post in itself.
Thank goodness for childcare, his wonderful Daddy and Grandparents

I have finished up in my job where I have been for five years and while it had its up and downs I did enjoy my job. Due to my chronic pain I have had to give up work for the foreseeable future as most days I can hardly manage to get out of bed never mind head to a desk in an office!

The fact that all my chronic pain is due to invisible illnesses PCOS, Endometriois, IBS and the twist in my bowel are not something people see and only my close family and friends really understand the pain I am in. What really bothers me is when people think oh Endometriois sure that's like PMS! Time it by 100 and you might be on the right track!

Some days are worse than others, some days I can get out of bed and feel semi normal, good days I can play with my little boy, go to the park and do family days out. I love those days because they remind me of a time last year when I could function normally and enjoy life. When I could deal with my illnesses individually, when I wasn't taking pain relief and a course of different tablets each day, when I didn't spent most of my time in doctor or hospital waiting rooms, or in bed asleep.

No matter what, I believe, I will get back to that normality, it might not be today, next week or even next year but I will get there. 

I will get back to being me

Today is a bad day but there is always tomorrow

Over The Weekend #31

Not alot of pictures this weekend because to be honest we didn't do much!

Saturday I was very lucky to be giving a lie and woken to breakfast in bed!

We pottered around the house, done some housework and some work in the garden

Paul then had the idea of turning Oisìn's cot into his toddler bed

I knew it was time but wow was I a wreck about it!

It's milestones like this that I don't know if we will get again 

Of course Oisìn's takes to everything so well and seemed very happy with his

big boy bed!

After baths and being put to bed in for the first time in his toddler bed

Oisìn was asleep with in minutes so candles was lit, wine poured and we settled down for Outlander

First night in his big boy bed was a success he only had one fall out of the bed

but we had a soft mat bedside the bed so he didn't cry just smiled at us and hopped back into bed!

Now just need to get rid of the soother at night and start toilet training!!

Think I'll start with the soother baby steps!!

Today was a slow day here this morning I was up early with Oisìn

It called for coffee and pastries

We watched Minions for the 100th time this week

I read for a while, I haven't been feeling 100% this week, with starting new meds on Wed

I think it's just my body getting use to them but I felt so tired this weekend

and had to take naps.

 While I went for a lie down Paul took Oisìn swimming I hate missing out on family time

but fatigue was so bad this weekend

I'm back in the hospital again on Tues and Thurs this week so I'm hoping it will be good news

The rest of today was spent, reading, watching TV, drinking tea and I'll be having an early night

Hope you all had a nice weekend

Christmas Madness & Hospital Drama!

Last week I ended up in hospital for four days!! I had been have sharp stabbing pains

in my lower left side of my stomach for two days

I left it go until the pain got so bad I couldn't stand and last Tuesday I was rushed to A&E

I had lots of scans and tests and found out Wednesday it was something called

Epiploic appendagitis which is when tissue on the bowel gets twisted

along with an inflamed cyst on my ovary!

I was put on fluids, pain relief and an antibiotic drip in hospital

by Friday I was feeling alot better and was thankfully allowed to go home!

I have been on meds since Friday at home and am feeling so much better

But I am now so behind in Christmas stuff, cards are wrote out still waiting to be posted,

presents are thankfully wrapped but in gift bags waiting to go to friends and family,

Christmas food shop needs to be done, house needs to be cleaned,

Oisín needs to get a haircut, and a trip to my brothers grave needs to happen

Meanwhile Oisín will not let me out of his sight encase I disappear again!

While this was such a horrible time for this to happen

it has made me realise even if all the things above don't happen

it doesn't matter

I'm alive and with my family at Christmas 

and that's what's it all about!

Babies, Babies Every Where!

Recently it seems my facebook newsfeed is full with friends announcing there pregnancy, Instagram is full of scan pictures, youtube is awash with pregnancy announcements, my blogger feed is all pregnancy updates along with some close friends also announcing there pregnancy

I am totally happy and blessed for all these people, family friends, social media friends and strangers

Creating and bringing a new life into the world is an amazing thing. One of the best feelings in the world. The love for your child is like no other and a love I never truly understood until my son came along. 

Now that Oisín is almost two I have longed to get pregnant and have a sibling for him. With my PCOS such a big part of my life I knew we would have to try for a while. We have being trying for almost a year now with no result, the treatment which seemed to have worked the first time around is not working. I have lost weight and have undergone a lifestyle change in eating right, losing weight weekly, do weekly exercise and start yoga classes. Nothing seemed to be working this time around for us, but we did get some good news this week.

We are now starting a new fertility treatment which is a little more intense which fingers crossed might work. I am taking a no stress approach this time around, trying to not let getting pregnant take up all my mind space and time. 

I hate when people ask me when are you having another one (meaning baby) Sometimes its not as easy as having another and sometimes couples can't have another child for one reason or other.

I am not giving up yet but if it never happens for me again at least I have this beautiful face

I might never be a Mammy to a large family but I AM a Mammy and thats all I ever wanted

My Weight Loss Journey

Where to start on this one!? Since having our beautiful little boy almost two years ago

I haven't been happy with my weight. I gained almost two stone when pregnant on Oisín 

and by the time I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes the damaged had been done!

Last year I lacked the motivation to do anything about my weight and actually gained another half a stone, so by this summer I was so unhappy about to go on holidays with a suitcase of clothes that didn't fit me!

Then I realised my best friends wedding was in two months and I couldn't fit into my bridesmaids dress!! I knew I had to do something, I could either comfort eating everything in sight or actually do something about.

So I took to the gym, done spinning classes, aqua fit and walking but with having PCOS I lose weight slowly I knew I need something to help me along and give me a boost.

So I decided to give the Forever Aloe Vera 9 day detox a go. I am not going to lie it was hard the first few days when you can't eat but drink the aloe vera gel and shakes is awful but knowing I had a goal at the end gave me so much motivation. I wanted to walk down that aisle holding my little boy's hand on my best friend's big day feeling and looking good in my bridesmaid's dress!

In the nine day's I lost just under a stone and was down 7inchs in my waist! I was thrilled the morning of the wedding my dress fitted perfect and I felt amazing

     

Afterwards I knew I didn't want to put the weight back on and

wanted to keep the feel good factor of losing weight. So my friend and I decided to officially join

Slimming World. I had been making Slimming World meals for a while but never went to join a group or was never on plan before. I am loving slimming world and find the meals delicious and the plan really easy to follow. I love going to group, meeting new people, sharing ideas, recipes and stories. So far in Slimming World I have lost 7lbs and am fitting into clothes that haven't fit me since Oisín was born! I am loving going clothes shopping again and am slowly becoming me again!

Day to Day life!

I have to admit I have been neglecting my blog recently sometimes life just gets in the way! We have been busy bee's and work has been crazy and busy so I have be tired and not in the mood to blog. I also have been getting PCOS treatment so that has been tiring. Normal blogging will resume soon but here is what we got up to recently.

1. Me and Mammy on a lovely meal out not often we do this so was happy we got the chance to this month
2. Family together to celebrate Laura May's Confirmation
3. Mexican night at our place yummy!
4. Lots and lots of reading
5. Normal busy busy day in work
6. Games night at my parents

1. Getting back swimming and its such fun too!
2. Stepping out of the salon getting my hair done such a good feeling
3. Coffee and papers

1. Pretty flowers from a friend
2. More pretty flowers
3. Lilies my favourite!

1. Yummy cupcakes a tea time treat with a friend
2. After a hard two weeks of PCOS treatment my friend surprised me with flowers, chocolates and candles I am so lucky to have such a thoughtful friend.
3. After feeling rotten after treatment swimming made me feel so much better.
4. Cheesy nachos yummy!
5. More reading!
6. My guilty pleasure!

1. Recent purchases
2. Our daily motto at work love working at Beacon Of Light
3. Steak, chips and salad with a glass of non-alcoholic wine.

Love / Hate

Hate

* Public Transport - The more I use it the more I dislike it! If its not buses being late, its women who think the handbag needs a seat in rush hour traffic, its people who push pass you to get on the bus, it's people who don't stand aside to let you get off the bus, its the odd weird person who always seems to sit beside me! We really need to get ourselfs a new car ASAP!

* People who spit in the street - its disgusting don't do it!

* Cold weather - I live in Ireland I should be use to the rain hail and cold weather but I'm not! Come on mother nature show us a bit of Spring...please!

* Having no motivation to go to the gym - I have a holiday in three months come on Lisa get with it! I need to get toned up so I will look good on the beach!

Love

* That it is St Patrick's Weekend - yippee long weekend and the day that makes everyone want to be Irish! Time to drown the shamrock (get drunk!)

* Things are looking up for me health wise - was back in the hospital about my PCOS. I could of kissed the doctor when he told us the treatments and medics are working fingers crossed for the next few months!

* The birds song I hear when walking to work - I'm fairly grumpy and cranky in the morning but the past couple of days the bird song I hear on the way to work is wonderful. If only I could sound like that in the mornings!

* That Fleetwood Mac have confirmed they are doing some old songs on tour - Stevie Nicks confirmed she will be singing Sisters Of The Moon on tour I LOVE this song and it's not been sung live since the early 80's! Hope its not dropped before the European leg of the tour!

What have you been loving and hating?

Battle of the Bulge - Week 18

Monday & Tuesday: Was really sick with sore tummy from my new meds and sore throat and ear infection. Didn't go to work for two days and spent 48 hours wrapped up in a duvet eating soup!

Wednesday: Felt well enough to go to work for a few hours then down to my parents where I managed to eat a little stew.

Thursday: Walked to work today, work dragged in today!! After work I met Paul and we went food shopping. Fell into bed at 9pm!!

Friday: Walked to work again today it was a lovely fresh morning so I just took my time strolling to work today! It was a long day in work and I got the bus home. Paul was working late so I just made a quick pasta bake enough so Paul could heat so up later.

Saturday: Most of the day was spent cleaning the apartment before my cousins came up. Dinner was beef fatias.

Sunday: Paul and I went for a little work around our park today and afterwards done some Christmas shopping. Our boiler broke in our apartment so the rest of the day was spent trying to get some one to fix it :(

This week wasn't great I am still trying to get use to my new meds the tablets are very strong and give me an upset tummy, but as the week went on I think I am starting to get used to them. Then our boiler broke down the middle of the week and it doesn't look like it can be repaired. Fingers crossed next week might be better in diet and exercise.



Love/Hate

Hate:

 

* That our heating boiler has broke - so we now have no heating or hot water. So I am now wearing more layers indoors than outside!!

 

* That the hubby will not let me put up our Christmas tree- maybe he is the reasonable one of the two of us but in my eyes he is Scrooge at the moment!!

 

* When we have 100's of TV channels and there is never anything on - really I spent twenty minutes the other day flick through channels and there was nothing on!!

 

* Young teenage couples kissing in public - no don't get me wrong I am not an old grump but the other day at the bus stop this guy almost swallowed his girlfriends face!!

 

* Being sick - first sore tummy from my new meds, then sore throat and now an ear infection.

 

 

Love:

 

* Its beginning to look alot like Christmas - I love the shops decorated and the Christmas songs, some may say its too early but I like it and I will have my decorations up in the next week or so!

 

* Buying my Christmas presents - can't wait to see the look on my family and friends faces at Christmas.

 

* That I am finally on new meds - even tho the meds are very harsh on my stomach I feel at least we might be getting somewhere.

 

* Listening to the sneaky Christmas song on my ipod - not confidant enough to listen on the ipod dock yet just encase the neighbours think I'm crazy!!

 

* The hubby - he has been great the past few weeks, bring me to the hospital for tests and looking after me when I'm sick. My rock x

Battle of the Bulge - Week 17

Week 17

Monday: Got a taxi to work I know I am getting so lazy! I did walk half way home and got a bus the rest of the way! Dinner was a really quick chicken and chips. Paul and I went for a walk around the park across for our apartments after dinner.

Tuesday: Walked to work today so a 7km walk. Work was busy today so I walked half way home and got a bus the rest of the walk. Dinner was beef hash with red onions, garlic, mash potatoes and corn on the hob.

Wednesday: Today was FINALLY my appointment with the hospital all went well thank God I am on new meds that are quite strong so they upset my tummy. I spent the rest of the day in bed as I was shattered from all the tests. Paul made a lovely chicken casserole for dinner it was yummy.

Thursday: Tummy was sick from my new meds but it was back to work. Walked to the bus stop and had seabass and potatoes for dinner.

Friday: Was lazy today wasn't feeling great so got a taxi to work and the bus home. I wasn't in the mood for cooking when I got home so we called for an Indian takeout it was lovely!

Saturday: The new meds really kicked in today and my tummy was really upset. Went to the inlaws for dinner was a lovely homemade Shepard's pie which I ha vent had in ages so it was really nice.

Sunday: Was feeling poorly today so Paul made dinner it was steak, leeks and mash lovely.

Sorry haven't been updating as much but I was really shattered from Wednesday onwards after my hospital appointment. My body has been trying to get use to my new meds and I also picked up a stomach bug over the weekend that has zapped all my energy the past few days. Hopefully the rest of this week will be a little better.

The Glad Game

I am Glad That -

 

- Its the weekend, work has been a little stressful this week glad its Friday and that I get to spent it with my Hubby and my parents.

 

- We have alot of our Christmas presents in glad to be prepared!

 

- It's card night it my parents tonight. Love game night!

 

- My appointment for the hospital is next week might finally get some answers and know what happens next.

 

 

What are you glad for?

Battle of the Bulge - Week 11

I have decided to take a bit of a different mind-set going into week 11 of my plan. I have decided there are worst things in the world than being a large size 14! I am going to look at different blogs and stuff and to try and learn how to dress for my size. I will still be doing exercise and trying to eat right. I will do my best, but I am not going to get upset or beat myself up anymore if I don't lost a pound or two. All I can to is my best and wait until I am back in the hospital in November and see what they say and what different treatment the doctors are going to put me on for my pcos.

Week 11:

Monday: Paul & I both had today off and we continued our anniversary long weekend with drinks and takeout food.

Tuesday: Back to work so I walked 4.5km to work today. Dinner was beef hash with baked potatoes and corn on the cob.

Wednesday: Walked another 4.5km to work  today. Dinner was pork chops with mash potatoes and fresh veg.

Thursday: I walked another 4.5km to work today, dinner as a really quick pasta bake.

Friday: I woke up this morning and my throat was really sore and nose feel like in has closed down! I had a really bad cold, so I didn't wall to work I got the bus to and from work. Dinner was a concoction of lemslip, uniflu,and chicken soup!

Saturday: I spent most of the day in bed today and it was so lovely and sunny out =( Today again I had lots of hot lemslip, drank lots of water, and took uniflu. I managed to have some chicken salad for dinner.

Sunday: Today I felt a good bit better and managed to cook some Sunday lunch. It was ham with potatoes and veg.

The Bad:

- Getting a really bad cold the end of the week it zapped the energy out of me =(

- Not getting to the gym this week.

The Good:

+ All the walking I done this week

+  My new out look on my weight gain.

So hopefully I will be back to top health next week and hopefully my new out look on my weight gain lasts a while!! Any other bloggers have any tips for dressing for a larger size or where is good to shop?

Battle of The Bulge - Week 1!

I have being trying to decide for the past couple of days should I share my problems with weight gain on this blog....I have decide I will as it will help me record how I am doing.
Due to Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) my body shape has changed alot. One of the many symptoms of PCOS is weight gain with extra weight around the waist. So as a result of that I have gained a stone in weight over the past five/six months....I have gone up almost two dress sizes from a size 10 to a size 14!! Over the weekend I weighted myself and decide that I have to do something about this weight gain, because of the fertility treatments I am starting soon I can't use any slimming products so I will have to do it the old fashioned way diet & exercise!
I will record how I do each week in a weekly post....i.e. what exercise I done, what I ate, the good things and my downfalls of each week. I am going to allow myself one naughty day a week were I can ate what I want, and maybe have a few drinks!
My goal is to lose 10 pounds & be a toned size 12 by September. I have bought myself a killer pair of jeans and would love to fit into them by September! Wish me luck!!

Week 1:

Monday I done two hours of housework that's exercise right? Had a mini BBQ for dinner with one baked potato.
Tuesday: I walked 2km and done 30 minutes exercise at home. Dinner was baked sea bass with baby potatoes, salad and courgettes.
Wednesday: Done water aerobics today...great fun even if I was one of the youngest women there. I also went shopping so covered some ground today...at a guess I walked about 2.5km. Dinner was home-made chicken tikka masala with rice.
Thursday: Paul & I walked 2km and dinner was quick pasta carbonara. I also had a sneaky bottle of cider & a huge piece of chocolate cake! =/
Friday: I walked 2.5km today and done 30 minutes exercise at home. Dinner was pork chops, baby potatoes, courgettes and salad.
Saturday: Today was my naughty day!!! So dinner was steak, homemade chips, onion rings and pepper sauce washed down with a glass of red wine! We went to an engagement party tonight so a few vodka and cranberry was had...maybe a few too many =) No exercise was done..unless you call drunk dancing exercise!
Sunday: Was in a bit of a bad state today...the morning after the night before!! Paul & I walked 2.5km today and dinner was tray baked chicken...(Jamie Oliver style) and potatoes.

The Bad:
- The bottle of cider I had on Thursday!
- The huge piece of chocolate cake I had on Thursday =/
- Ate a lot of carbs this week.
- My legs and feet are aching!
- Walking in the rain =(

The Good:
+ Feeling the benefits of walking already.
+ Not being out of breath when taking the stairs in our apartment!
+ My legs are aching..surely that's a good sign!
+ Getting lots of fresh air...even if its wet air!

Overall I feel good after this week my body is starting to get use to the walking and exercise...hopefully I can keep it up!!!

Tinnitus, PCOS, And Deciding To Go Back To College....

Perforated Ear Drum & Tinnitus

Over the past ten months I have had a bit of hard luck...three months before we got married I was diagnosed with an perforated eardrum in my left ear. This is when a small hole or rupture happens to the ear drum the normal causes of it are from infection, loud noises, or flying with a bad cold. I already had a perforated eardrum in my left ear and had surgery to repair it in 2005. Unfortunately for me in some cases it can be reoccurring , because I already had surgery my doctors want to wait a few months to see if it might heal on its own.
Due to my illness I was unable to keep my job as it was a Receptionist / PA. Affects of a perforated eardrum are loss of hearing, dizziness due to infection and I also have tinnitus so needless to say I wasn't getting any sleep and couldn't hear people on the switchboard!
Of all the affects of a perforated ear drum Tinnitus is the worst, its like a permanent buzzing or ringing in your ear. When I have an ear infection it gets worse, during the day the symptoms of tinnitus is not too bad but at night is when it really gets me down...imagine at night when everything is silent and just as your about to drop off this loud buzzing in your ears. It's terrible I often get up at all hours of the morning crying in frustration because I cant get to sleep with it. Luckily I was well enough to go on our honeymoon to Mexico. I am still on the waiting list for more surgery for my left ear. Fingers crossed I will get a date soon for my surgery.

Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome

After we got back from honeymoon we decide it was maybe time to start a family!! After a few months of trying with nothing happening we went to the doctors after some tests I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. It basically means that I don't ovulate properly, my body doesn't produce enough hormones for my eggs to grown big enough to ovulate. We have a few options, Clomid is one of the fertility drugs that I plan on starting soon. Fingers crossed that it will work in our first few times.

Going Back To College

After we where told that I has PCOS and that getting pregnant was going to take a while I tried to get a part time retail job (a position where my hearing problems wouldn't be to much of an issue) but without any luck. Finally after some long talks. Paul & I agreed that it would be a good option for me to go back to college. So I have applied for a 1 year course to do Counselling & Communications. I will not know until August if I have got a place on the course in September but I really really hope I do as it is something I would love to do as a career.

I will let you know how we get on in all three things in the future xxx